Understanding Why I Struggle with People and Their Behaviors

There are some days we get irritated or disconnected to other people. Maybe it is an off day or a cringeworthy moment, but if it becomes a recurring event, then we must reflect on why we feel that way. Fighting with people and their behavior does not always mean that there is something about them. Instead, it could be related to our own feelings, experiences, or presumptions.

Let's go over some of the main reasons why do i hate people and how we can better understand these feelings.

Past Experiences Influence Our Feelings

Our history plays a big role in how we perceive and relate with other people. If we have been betrayed, hurt, or disappointed by someone in the past, it may make us wary of trusting people. The old wounds may make us overly sensitive to certain attitudes or behaviors, even though the person we are interacting with may not have any bad intentions.

For example, someone who has betrayed a friend may find it difficult to trust another person. Knowing that all these feelings tend to stem from past experiences can help us to start healing and be receptive to others.

Complementary Personalities

Sometimes, we just get along poorly with people because we have such different personalities. We all feel and act in our own way. For instance, someone who enjoys routine would be frustrated with someone who is spontaneous. Or, an introvert would be drained by someone who is always outgoing and energetic.

These differences do not make a person wrong but can be a point of war if we don't understand each other. Being sensitive to them makes us more patient and tolerant towards other people.

Unrealistic Expectations

A large reason we struggle with individuals is when we put expectations on them. We all think that someone else ought to behave in certain ways: they should be on time, kind to our children, or empathetic if we are having a bad day. And if they do not meet our expectations, sometimes we get frustrated and let down.

However, we should ask ourselves if those expectations are fair. Do we expect others to be doing something that they do not even know we want? Only by being clear on what we need and by learning how to regulate our expectations can we make our relationships with others much more fluid.

The Effect of Social Media

Social media has the potential to make our difficulties with people worse. When we notice other people's postings about their ideal lives, we tend to feel that we do not live up to expectations. Comparing ourselves to what people upload online may leave us feeling disconnected or annoyed with the people around us.

Stepping away from social media can allow us to break the pattern of comparing and instead focus on actual relationships in our lives. We should keep in mind that what we're seeing isn't necessarily real, and it's alright to have flaws.

Social Anxiety and Overthinking

We have some who experience social anxiety, which keeps us overanalyzing every encounter. We may fear that everyone is judging us or that we've said the wrong thing, even though they have not provided any indication of this. Social anxiety can cause us to misinterpret people's words or actions.

Getting over social anxiety is something that takes practice and time. The more that we expose ourselves to social situations and practice settling our nerves, the less difficult it is to observe that most people aren't judging us nearly as harshly as we believe.

Not Having Clear Boundaries

We may also get frustrated with people if we are not setting boundaries. This makes us drained and frustrated if we allow others to use a lot of our time, energy, or space. In addition, if an individual demands favors without giving anything in return, we may be feeling worked over.

It's crucial to learn how to set and assert our boundaries. It is okay to say no when we need to, take time for ourselves, and ask for respect in our relationships. It helps us create healthier and more balanced relationships with individuals. 

Conclusion

When we grapple with other people and what they do, it's probably about us and how we feel and have experienced things instead of about the other person. If we get to the bottom of why we're angry, then we can fix it and have healthier relationships. We just have to learn to be patient with people and ourselves, speak clearly and respectfully to set boundaries, and communicate with honesty. This way, we can have healthier and more significant relationships with people around us.

It's okay to struggle sometimes—it's how we learn and grow from these moments that really count.